Two more things to move

Yesterday I crossed another experience off my “to-do-before-potentially-leaving-California” list and attended a taping of the Ellen Degeneres show. (Lest you think all the field trips on my list involve show business, I also plan to visit the graves of famous movie stars at Forest Lawn cemetery and tour the LA Museum of TV and Radio. Okay, so they do all involve show business.)

Anyway, I’d always wanted to see the Ellen show and I’m glad I had the opportunity, even though it meant getting up at 5:30, standing in line for hours to get a confirmed seat, then waiting a couple hours more to get through security and finally collapse onto a seat in the studio audience.

The show was themed “As Seen on TV;” it included flashbacks to favorite infomercials, Ellen’s mom trying out a variety of exercise products, and interviews with Richard Simmons and the inventer of “huggable hangers.” It was fun, even though I think “favorite informercials” is an oxymoron and I have yet to buy anything advertised only on TV.

Ironically, though, I now own two “as seen on TV” products—every member of the studio audience received a Ronco rotisserie barbecue thing (you know, “set it and forget it”) and Richard Simmons’ new programmable food steamer. It was hysterical to see hundreds of us lumbering toward our cars (all of which were blocks if not miles away) with quite heavy armloads of unnecessary cookware. Only in America.

We also received a box of the huggable hangers, which are supposedly extra-thin (so they don’t take up much room in the closet) and made of velvet (so your clothes don’t fall off.) To share my good fortune I’ll mail the box to the first person to send me an email at buzz@standardpub.com. You’ll have a fun present and I’ll have one less thing to load on the moving van—it’s a win for both of us.